#5 - My Own Darling Children - January 29, 1903

Brick Haven
Jan 29, 1903

My own darling children,

I received your very welcome letters & was delighted to hear from you & to know that you are well. We are all sick with colds & cousin Mary has been very sick, but is better again. Bettie please send me brother's address when you write again, he never writes to me & I am so anxious to hear from him & to know how he is getting along. Bettie please burn my letters as soon as you read them. I never feel like writing any more & am ashamed for anyone to see my letters. I have been sick ever since summer & am now very weak & nervous, but I think I will be better soon.

I am going to send Cousin Mary's picture, but you must not mention it in your letters for she does not want me to send it & would not like it, but I just think it is cute. The baby is much prettier than this picture. He is very interesting.

You have both improved a great deal in your writing.

Try to do the best you can children & God will do the rest & answer our prayers some day. He has seen best to separate us for a while.

Good bye darling ones. Pray often for help & comfort & all things will work around for our good some day. Write again soon to your devoted Mother.

 

Boy, am I thankful that Bettie didn't burn her mother's letters! 

This letter leads me to believe that Bettie & Jeannette are together at least. I wish I had more of the envelopes from the letters. I'm assuming that the girls are still in Belfast, NY just 20 days after Alice wrote to Bettie there (see the blog post that includes letter #3). I still don't know who they were living with at that time - maybe Uncle Eddie. The living situations will unfold some more in the coming letters, but never become entirely clear. 

Wouldn't it be fun to see the photo of Mary & the baby? I need to go through all of the photos I have in Viola's collection to see if there is anything that looks like it could be of Mary & baby Clinton Swift... 

Here is one photo that I think could definitely be of Mary Swift. I have seen a photo of Mary later in life (I posted it on a previous entry), which was added to Ancestry.com by Mary's great-grandson, and so this one compares very favorably, and seems to be a photo of Mary in her younger years. It's just a hunch though. 

How sad it must've been for Alice to spend so much time with her niece Mary & great-nephew Clinton and not be able to see her own children... It really does bother me, and I wish I knew the reason & the outcome...

#4 - Brick Haven - January 13th, 1903

Brick Haven

  
Jan 13^th, 1903

My dear darling Jeannette,

I have wanted to answer your letter before, but have so much writing to do. I have not had an opportunity sooner. I wrote to Bettie last week & hope to get an answer soon. I am miserable when I do not hear from my children regular, so please write often Jeannette.
I rec’d a letter from Vi for Xmas & a nice collar but have not answered her letter yet. I do not have much time to write, besides I have been sick. It is very cold out here & the houses are cold, but it will not be long before we will be in a home of our own to do as we please.

I have written to Bro. twice since hearing from him. Now I do not know where to write.

I will send you a picture of Cousin Mary & her Baby. She is ashamed of it, but I think it is cute don’t you?

I will have to close now, Jeannette, as Cousin Mary is waiting for me to take the baby. Write soon if not sooner to your devoted Mother.

This is one of Alice's letters that doesn't seem to have a lot of substance. It leaves me wondering several things. Where is Jeannette at this point, and who is she staying with? She is 11 years old. 

Alice seems frustrated when she says "we will be in a home of our own to do as we please." I wonder what her living situation is like with the Swifts. Are they kind to her? Do they treat her like "poor old Aunt Alice?" Alice, by the way, was only 44 when she wrote these letters. 

What kind of illness plagues Alice throughout these letters? Was it something that contributed to her death 4 years later?

I like the way Alice refers to her son Dare as "Bro", and her daughter Viola as "Vi" in many of the letters. This gives me a sense that the Marmadukes didn't relate to each other as differently as my family does today, with nicknames & all. 

#3 - My Dear Bettie - Jan 7th, 1903

Brick Haven, Va

Jan 7^th, 1903

My dear Bettie:

Your very welcome letter was duly rec’d & was very thankful of the money, but am afraid you needed it your own dear self. Never mind Bettie I think we will all be together again soon, so keep courage darling children. I know you have had a hard time and our trials have been severe, yet I know they all must be for some purpose & for our good in some way, so lets have courage to the end of the battle.

Be a good girl Bettie & do the best you can which I am sure you do. Oh Bettie,

 

I do want to see you & Jeannette so bad! I will write Jeannette soon, had intended to write tonight, but it is so late & all are getting ready for bed.

I have not seen May for some time, as the weather has been so bad I could not get to town. I rec’d a letter from Vi a  few days ago & she sent me a very pretty collar.

Bettie I will have to close with lots of love & kisses for you & my darling baby. Write soon to your devoted

Mother

Let me begin by observing several things in this letter & the prior letter from my last post.

This is letter #3 in my collection from Alice. It was written January 7, 1903, about 2 weeks after letter #2. I would imagine that there were even more letters written by Alice to her daughters, but these are what remain. 

In letter #2, Alice refers to Aunt Janie, Cousin Mary, the baby, & Cousin Johnny. Aunt Janie is Alice's sister Mary Jane Sandys, who remained unmarried until her death in 1920 at the age of 74. She was 56/57 at the time that these letters were written. From what I can tell from my research on Ancestry.com & other sites, Alice was staying with Aunt Janie in Brickhaven, Alexandria County, Virginia (I believe just outside of Washington DC). Aunt Janie also appeared to be living with her niece Mary Sanford Swift, daughter of Janie & Alice's sister Rosalie Vashtie Sandys Sanford. The Sanford name is fairly prominent in Virginia, so I will be exploring that more very soon. Mary married John Clinton Swift on December 1, 1894 in her mother's home in Stafford County, Virginia. John Clinton is called "Johnny" in these letters. 

Coincidentally (or maybe not), Alice's son Dare Marmaduke married Johnny's sister Louise Swift in 1906. Louise bore Dare 3 children, & then in 1925 she committed suicide by drinking Lysol. Yikes! So Alice had a Swift as a daughter-in-law & also as a nephew-in-law. Interesting!

Here are photos of Mary & Johnny - they were added to Ancestry.com by Louis Shomette, my awesome 3rd cousin 2x removed that I have collaborated with some on Ancestry.com. 

 

Anyway, back to the letters... I do have the envelope from this particular letter, which shows that Bettie & probably Jeannette were living in Belfast, NY. It is my belief that they were living with their Uncle Eddie (as future letters may hint) in New York. I'm currently going through the US phone directories to pin down where Uncle Eddie was living in 1902 & 1903. I know that he was in Brooklyn, Kings, New York in 1910, and had married a woman from New York in 1901/2, so I'm safely assuming that he was living in New York in 1902/3. I'll keep looking though. 

This letter & the one previous emphasizes the desperation in Alice Marmaduke over not being with her children. As a mother of a toddler myself, I cannot imagine the heartache of being separated from my child, especially in circumstances beyond my own control. Heartbreaking! 

The next letters are much more interesting, so stay tuned!

-Julie

#2 - My dear darling Bettie - Dec 25, 1902

Brick Haven, Alex Co., Va. 

Dec 25th 1902. 

My dear darling Bettie, 

I rec'd your very nice letter some time ago but have been sick & could not answer sooner. This is Xmas day & cousin Mary & Aunt Janie have gone to Mrs. Swift's to spend the day, but there is no pleasure for me Bettie except with my children, anywhere, or at any time. I enclose a letter to Jeannette, as she wrote in her last that she expected to be with you soon.
 

Please write me everything Bettie about yourself & Jeannette and just as soon as you receive this as I am so anxious to hear from you. Cousin Mary has a darling little baby. He is very smart & pretty. Cousin Johnny's health is very poor & is sick all the time. 

I can only write you a short letter this time Bettie as I have a number to write and will not have time again. So hoping to hear from you. 

I am as ever, Your devoted Mother 

 PS. please send me a stamp in your next Bettie if you have one.

#1 - My dear darling Jeannette

This is the 1st in a collection of a dozen letters written by Alice Sandy Marmaduke. I am sure that they are a fragment of what must have been many more letters, but they do give us a glimpse of the Marmaduke family in 1902 & 1903. Because of Alice's vague language, I can only guess at some of the underlying struggles going on within the family. These letters are what first attracted me to the Marmaduke family, and what drew me in to take a deeper look at my ancestors.

Let me first introduce you to Alice May Sandy Marmaduke. Born August 9, 1858 in Essex Co, Virginia, Alice was born to a family who could trace themselves to original settlers of Virginia (more information on that in another letter). I have no records of her childhood aside from the 1860 census. Her father Edward is listed in the 1870 census, but the rest of the family is missing. The 1880 census curiously shows Alice & her sister Mary Jane living with their older brother, Edward M. Sandy, in Washington DC. Alice was 22 at the time, and her mother had passed away several years earlier. 

Alice married James Berkeley Marmaduke in 1881, and their marriage was recorded in the newspaper & can be found in the Washington DC health department marriage records. The interesting thing is that my family has their original marriage certificate, which is in a glass frame. I am trying to find it, and will scan & share it when I do. 

The Marmadukes made their home in Spotsylvania County, Virginia. 

Alice & Berkeley's first child, a son named Andrew Dare, was born nearly 9 months to the day of their marriage! He was followed by 4 daughters, Ada Viola, May Croxton, Bettie Gordon, & Jeannette. 

Alice became a very young widow on December 26, 1892. The circumstances of Berkeley's death are still unknown to me. 

We pick up the story about 10 years later, in 1902. In the 1900 census, 4 of the 5 children were living in Spotsylvania with their mother near the Hilldrup, Wenger, & Mason families (I believe off of Old Plank Road). But things have changed in just 2 years. In late 1902, Alice Marmaduke's children are all living apart from her and apparently all apart from each other. Jeannette was just 10 years old at the time. I cannot imagine what it is that separated this family, and as the coming letters will show, it seems that it is outside of Alice's control. 

Below is the 1st letter in our collection. My hope is to post the entire collection of letters in a set of blog posts over the next few weeks. This one has very little substance, but does provide us some context clues - date, Alice's location, Dare's location... 

 

Spotsylvania Co. Va,

Oct 27^th 1902

My dear darling Jeannette

I am so anxious to hear from you & to know how you are getting along. Please write to me at once Jeannette.

I rec’d a letter from May a few days ago. She is well & doing well.

Dare is in Fredericksburg & is well. Jeannette will you please send me Bettie’s address. I can’t understand why she does not write sometimes.

I cannot write much this time, but if you will ans this right away I will try to write you a long letter & give you all the news.

I am as ever

Your devoted Mother

2^nd page: “I will send you Mamma’s letter” – presumably written by Jeannette or Bettie. 

Well, that's all for tonight. More of Alice's letters to come!

Dear Lindsay,

May 11, 1898 

Dear Lindsay - I don't believe that I have written to you since I have been here. I reckon you would like to know how I am getting along in Chili. Every thing is very pleasant and nice but I get home-sick some times. I heard that you was taking music lessons from Miss Crawfort. Have you got any organ yet. I am taking lessons on the piano and I am going to get Uncle Eddie to get me an organ when I go back to Pittsburg. Mamma is out at Oakdale and she likes it very much, but she says that she is coming back home in the Fall if she can. I am getting along quite well in school. I haven't got but six more weeks to go. Lindsay have you swept your yard yet. We have already cleaned the big lawn up here. We had arbor day as a holiday and all of the girls had a big time. I had to help make flower beds. Lindsay I room with a very nice little girl. She is eighteen years old but she aint a bit taller than May. How is Johnnie getting along in his store. I suppose he misses us running down there two or three times a day. Has Mrs. Boe (Roe?) got everything fixed nice. I would give any thing if I only could get back home again. I can't write you a long letter this time as it is nearly time for me to go to school. I can get there in five minutes. Lindsay you must write me a long long letter next time. News is very scarce and I will have to close.Write soon to your cousin Viola. Love to all. Excuse writing. 

Chesbro Seminary North Chili Monroe Co New York 

Viola Marmaduke, location unknown. Approx 1898-1900

Viola Marmaduke, Chivis School, 1896, age 13

Viola Marmaduke, Pittsburg, PA - approx 1898-1900

This letter was written by Viola Marmaduke (my 2nd great-grandmother), age 14. She was at school in Chili, New York, almost 450 miles (by modern travel routes) from her home in Spotsylvania, Virginia. I wonder what this means about the Marmaduke family. Was it "normal" in the late 1800s for families to send their children away to school? From what I have gathered from census records, other letters (which I will reveal in future posts), and general family knowledge, the Marmadukes were not wealthy. I do know that Viola's father Berkeley passed away 5 1/2 years earlier (the circumstances of his death are currently a mystery to me). She was 2nd child in a family of 5 children. 

Anyway, this letter was written to Viola's 1st cousin, 1x removed, Mary Lindsay Hilldrup (see the relationship chart between the two girls - above). Above is the only photo I have of Mary Lindsay Hilldrup, and it is snipped from a school photo that also includes all 4 of the Marmaduke sisters. (Chivis School, Spotsylvania, Virginia. 1896.) Interestingly, Lindsay was 7 years older than Viola, so I am curious about the nature of their relationship. Maybe Lindsay was a babysitter or a "big sister" figure to Viola. 

Mrs. Crawfort appears to be the future Mrs. Dare, who married A. John Dare in 1899. She is referred to as "Mrs Dare" in 1902-3 in a letter from Viola's mother to Viola's sister. That's  all I know about her though. The Dares are neighbors of the Hilldrups & Marmadukes in Spotsylvania, and probably related, but I'm not sure how. Alice & Berkeley Marmaduke likely named their first child, Andrew Dare Marmaduke (who went by "Dare") for this family. It would make sense if they were related.

Uncle Eddie... Oh my, Uncle Eddie has quite the reputation. He was Alice Sandy Marmaduke's brother, and his story is certainly not unfolded completely. I will write more about him soon. Let's just say that his reputation is controversial! 

I wish I knew where Oakdale was. Does anyone know? Based on letters written by Alice Marmaduke, she seemed to live in several places (although I believe they were all temporary solutions to a larger problem). This is the only letter that references a place called Oakdale.

I can't figure out who "Johnnie" is, except that he may be Lindsay's brother John. But his occupation on the 1900 census is "Farmer" & "General Farm" on the 1910 census. John Hilldrup later married Gertrude Doggett (Gertie), who shows up very often in postcards, letters, and photos written by Viola & her mother. I hope to learn more about Gertie as time goes on.

Mrs. Boe/Roe... from my searches in the 1900 Spotsylvania census, it looks like her name is Anna Rowe, and she was an elderly widowed woman and a landlord... I guess that would explain Viola's question about everything being fixed nice, but I don't know her role in their lives. 

Sadly, Lindsay Hilldrup died a little over a year after this letter was written, at the age of 23. The newspaper clipping is posted below (Alexandria Gazette. September 06, 1899). I haven't found anything more about her life or death. I would love to know more about this cousin of my 2nd great-grandmother.

Closing for now. So much more to write soon!

Wilbur Wise Marmaduke

I've mentioned the Library of Congress's Chronicling America website before. This site is a jewel mine for family research! Chronicling America provides digital copies of newspapers from all over the country going all the way back to 1836. 

Somehow I ended up searching the newspapers for Wilbur Wise Marmaduke, and he turned out to be more of an interesting character than I originally thought!

Before I share the story, here's a short summary of Wilbur & his family:

Wilbur's father, Milton, was a brother (possibly a 1/2 brother) of my 3rd great-grandfather Berkley Marmaduke. Wilbur was born in Montross, Westmoreland County, Virginia in 1871, and grew up in Washington, DC. He married & had a son, but I do not know much about either of them yet. 

What first interested me about Wilbur was this postcard in my great-grandmother's collection of family postcards (over a thousand postcards!). 

Oddly enough, we have 2 of this postcard from a trip that Viola Marmaduke's sister Bettie took to see him in Miami. I think it's so interesting that Wilbur & his wife would have postcards made of their home. Was that common? The postcard is postmarked 1935 on the back, and is a postcard written from Bettie to Viola. Bettie was suffering from cancer at the time. Here's a copy of what she wrote below: 

More about Bettie & the details surrounding this postcard later... 

Anyway, Wilbur & his 2nd wife Viola (not to be confused with Viola Marmaduke) moved to Florida sometime between 1920 & 1928. He was in his 50s at the time. They moved there as hotel managers, and Wilbur died in 1947 at the age of 76.

So back to Washington, DC in 1898. I found a series of articles in the Washington, DC Times about Wilbur & his father Milton. I'll let the articles tell the story...

September 4, 1898

It reads: "Institutes Suite for Damages. Jacob Spliedt has entered suit for $5,000 damages against Wilbur W. Marmaduke & Milton M. Marmaduke, alleging that Thursday last the defendants assaulted and violently beat, kicked, bruised and ill-treated him. The plaintiff claims that he has been permanently injured therefrom and is hindered and prevented from pursuing his ordinary avocation. He also says he has had to pay out the sum of $100 for the treatment of his hurts. Messrs. Bierny and Woodward represent the plaintiff."

September 30, 1898

This one reads:
TICKET BROKERS 'TROUBLE The assault case of Spliedt against the Marmadukes on trial. The case of Wilbur W. Marmaduke and Milton M. Marmaduke, charged with assaulting Jacob Spliedt September 2, was taken up before Judge Scott in the Police Court at 1 o'clock this afternoon. The jury was called during the morning, being made up as follows: J. C. Miles, James H. Tucker, Warren F. Basim, D. E. Kealey, Chas. Barnes, Theodore Heilman, Charles T. Willis, John Y. Yates, Lawrence Cole, Joseph N. Kudd, John II. Baxter and Thomas D. Manning. The defendants have been under $500 bail each, and at the preliminary hearing pleaded not guilty, demanding a jury trial. An interesting incident in the case is the fact that Mr. Spliedt has entered a law suit against the Marmadukes, asking for heavy damages for injuries resulting to him in the alleged assault. The Prosecuting Witness. The first witness heard was Mr. J. Spliedt, who charged that the Marmadukes, father and son, attacked him while on his way down Pennsylvania avenue in front of the National Hotel on the afternoon of September 1 without any provocation. He had his umbrella raised, when suddenly he was attacked by the two men. Mr. Marmaduke, Sr. said to his son: "Now you have got him, do him up good." The younger Marmaduke then, he said, struck him twice on the head and once in the side with a large hammer. Subsequently he went to the office of Dr. D. Percy Hickling, who, upon an examination, found that one of his ribs was broken. Mr. Spliedt was cross-examined at much length by Mr. Tracy L. Jeffords, counsel for the Messrs. Marmaduke, but the direct testimony of the witness was not shaken. Dr. D. P. Hickling testified that on the afternoon of September 1 Mr. Spliedt came to his office to be treated; the latter had two wounds-one on his face and the other on the forehead. The patient also had a rib broken. The injuries could have been inflicted, he said, with a blunt instrument. Mr. Spliedt was sick for some days following the day he received the injuries, which were very recent, not more then two or three hours at the most. Dr. H. F. Price said he saw a scuffle between the Marmadukes and Mr. Spliedt, in which one of the Marmadukes struck Mr. Spliedt in the head with a hammer. Mr. Spliedt was carrying a raised umbrella at the time. Thomas Hill, who described himself as "bootblack and general hustler," said he saw Mr. Spliedt struck by one of the Marmadukes with a hammer, but whether by the father or son he did not know. Defendants Testify. Mr. Wilbur W. Marmaduke, one of the accused, was the first witness for the defense. He said that he and Mr. Spliedt were rivals in business, but denied that he struck the prosecuting witness. His father, he said, struck Mr. Spliedt, but not until after Mr. Spliedt struck the witness. Mr. Melton M. Marmaduke admitted striking Mr. Spliedt, but claimed that the latter struck his son before he did so. Witness said he struck Mr, Spliedt repeatedly. The case was still on trial when this report was closed.

Oct 1, 1898

 

The article says: "Small Fines Imposed. The case of Jacob Spleidt against the Marmadukes. The trial of Wilbur W. Marmaduke & Milton M. Marmaduke, ticket brokers, charged with assaulting Jacob Spleidt, also a ticket broker, in front of the former's place of business, under the National Hotel, on the afternoon of September 1, occurred in Police Court yesterday. The jury was out fifteen minutes and returned a verdict of guilty. In disposing of the case Judge Scott said that there were many things in favor of the defendants, and, therefore, he imposed the lowest possible fine, $15 each. While the jury was considering the case against the Marmadukes the clerk presented a charge of disorderly conduct against Spleidt, preferred by the Marmadukes. Judge Scott heard the same witnesses that had testified in the preceding case and the defendant was dismissed."

WOW. No words! 

More soon, 

Julie